December 4, 2010

Pokemon: Win or Fail? 30-45


  • Name: Dangoro
  • Number: 030
  • Type: Rock
  • Species: Mantle Pokemon
  • Looks like: a bunch of rocks stuck together
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: It looks vaguely like a bomb-omb.
Dangoro is obviously meant to be this game's geodude, which means you'll see him every five seconds in caves. What a sorry replacement. He looks like a pile of rocks. I can't tell if that hole in the middle is supposed to be an eye or a mouth or what. 
FAIL



  • Name: Gantoru
  • Number: 031
  • Type: Rock
  • Species: Ore Pokemon
  • Looks like: a stone insect or crustacean
  • Awesome factor: 3/10
  • Trivia: It evolves via trade with no extra conditions. 
Well, I guess that was an eye after all. When Dangoro evolves he becomes kind of insectoid or crustacean-like in appearance. It's got three "legs" with red gemstones for "feet" and "teeth" and more gemstones sticking out of its back. 
MEH

  • Name: Gigaiath
  • Number: 032
  • Type: Rock
  • Species: High Pressure Pokemon (wtf)
  • Looks like: they overdid it. 
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: He's the only pure rock third stage evolution.
Now they've overdone it. They were headed in the right direction with Gantoru and they ruined it. This guy just looks like a buch of rocks and gems stuck together in no particular order that they tried to pass off as a creature by giving him a vague body. 
FAIL

  • Name: Koromori
  • Number: 033
  • Type: Psychic/Flying
  • Species: Bat Pokemon
  • Looks like: a fuzzy cyclops bat with one tooth and a heart shaped eye
  • Awesome factor: 0/10
  • Trivia: Oh my God I just realized that's not an eye!
That thing is his nose!? They didn't make it very obvious. Apparently his eyes are supposed to be represented by those "w" shapes next to his heart nose. Still, this is probably my least favorite design of the whole 156. It's obviously meant as a zubat replacement and it's really going to make me miss the irritating little guy. It's a freaking fuzzball with wings!
FAIL

  • Name: Kokoromori
  • Number: 034
  • Type: Psychic/Flying
  • Species: Courtship Pokemon (NOT BAT!?)
  • Looks like: a dumb bat
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: That stupid nose comes from the heart-nosed bat (whose nose looks nothing like that).
We can now tell what the hell this thing is trying to be. Despite its species, it's obviously a bat as it has the body and wings of one. However, the design is incredibly lame. The ears are fused together for no apparent reason, it's got big teeth sticking out and a goofy grin, and that tail is just terrible. What's with all the hearts!?
FAIL

  • Name: Mogurew
  • Number: 035
  • Type: Ground
  • Species: Mole Pokemon
  • Looks like: a mole
  • Awesome factor: 3/10
  • Trivia: He's the only pure ground type of this generation.
Mogurew is a fairly straightforward looking mole Pokemon. His arms form shovels so he can dig but they also look extremely dangerous. I actually like the army camo body and coloration. Too bad he looks like he's praising Jesus. 
MEH

  • Name: Doryuzu
  • Number: 036
  • Type: Ground/Steel
  • Species: Deep Earth Pokemon (wtf)
  • Looks like: a badass armored mole
  • Awesome factor: 6/10
  • Trivia: The only damaging steel-type move it learns is metal claw. 
This guy is pretty cool. He's got pointless metal bits on his arms and head but they make him look kind of badass. Doyuzu is not a happy looking fellow. I like the change in coloration and pattern for no reason as well as the pointless red spikes. So, really, nothing about this Pokemon makes any logical sense, but he's pretty cool anyway.
WIN

  • Name: Tabunne
  • Number: 037
  • Type: Normal
  • Species: Hearing Pokemon (what!?)
  • Looks like: I don't even know.
  • Awesome factor: 0/10
  • Trivia: This is the only Pokemon ever you can find in any grass, which must be annoying as hell. 
what is this I dont even
FAIL


  • Name: Dokkora
  • Number: 038
  • Type: Fighting
  • Species: Muscle Pokemon
  • Looks like: this game's machop!
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: n/a
I'm not even sure what this thing is based on, but I do know it has giant freaking doom veins all over its body and it creeps me out. The Nose reminds me of Goofy, but the facial expression looks like trouble. He's always carrying a wooden beam for some reason.
FAIL

  • Name: Dotekkotssu
  • Number: 039
  • Type: Fighting
  • Species: Muscle Pokemon
  • Looks like: I don't even know.
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: n/a
He's got a weird lumpy head, clown nose, and scary thin waist. Plus those creepy veins. But now they've changed color. Also, he's constantly holding a girder. 
FAIL

  • Name: Roobushin 
  • Number: 040
  • Type: Fighting
  • Species: Muscle Pokemon
  • Looks like: a roid-raging clown
  • Awesome factor: 8/10
  • Trivia: He has the highest attack of all fighting Pokemon
This guy is a giant roid-raging clown! Look at him! It looks like he's thinking, "See these stone pillars? They used to be one stone pillar. I will break you like I broke this if you look at me wrong." And that grip looks like it could easily crush your head. I also like the goatee he's got going on there. And his name is "roobushin" which sounds awesomely lame.
WIN



  • Name: Otamaro
  • Number: 041
  • Type: Water
  • Species: Tadpole Pokemon
  • Looks like: a tadpole
  • Awesome factor: 2/10
  • Trivia: n/a
If there's one thing that bothers me most this gen it's new Pokemon designed to replace old Pokemon. Here, we're obviously looking at a replacement for poliwag. Unfortunately, this guy's goofy face (why does a tadpole have eyebrows?) nocks him down a few points in the awesome department. 
FAIL

  • Name: Gamagaru
  • Number: 042
  • Type: Water/Ground
  • Species: Vibration Pokemon (why?)
  • Looks like: a mutated tadpole
  • Awesome factor: 1/10
  • Trivia: n/a
And when Otamaro evolves he becomes... this. Whatever this is. It's not a tadpole but it's not a frog either. Whatever it is, it's ugly as hell and it looks like trouble. And now he's a ground type. Why?
FAIL

  • Name: Gamgeroge
  • Number: 043
  • Type: Water/Ground
  • Species: Vibration Pokemon (what does this mean!?)
  • Looks like: a lumpy frog
  • Awesome factor: 8/10
  • Trivia: n/a
I actually really like this guy for some reason. It vaguely reminds me of toxicroak, but with a much more appealing design. Finally, the out of place tan color is gone and those bumps no longer look out of place. It kind of looks like he's wearing goggles. I really can't explain this guy's charm for me, but I like him. 
WIN

  • Name: Negeki
  • Number: 044
  • Type: Fighting
  • Species: Judo Pokemon
  • Looks like: a ruby doing judo
  • Awesome factor: 4/10
  • Trivia: n/a
Yeah so this is basically a gemstone version of hitmonchan. Not the best design, but not terrible. 
MEH

  • Name: Dageki
  • Number: 045
  • Type: Fighting
  • Species: Karate Pokemon
  • Looks like: a sapphire doing karate
  • Awesome factor: 4/10
  • Trivia: n/a
And this one is basically a gemstone version of hitmonlee. Not spectacular, just okay.
MEH

Come back tomorrow for more!

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