March 13, 2013

The List: 10 reasons to give ponies a chance

WARNING: THIS POST CONTINS COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF PONIES. HATER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

"I say, old bean. These ponies are quite the conundrum."
"Quite. The cause of much rabblrousing discussion."
"Indeed, It's quite the kerfuffle." 


Confession time. I watch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and love it. Should I really be confessing that? It is something worthy of confession? Wouldn't that imply that it's bad? A lot of people would say that. Those people are idiots. Friendship is goddamn magic!

"But," you say, "those pony freaks are pedophiles that fap to ponies!" Oh yes, I seem to have forgotten that no other fandom has a percentage of total weirdos who do stuff like that. No, there is definitely no Transformers porn on the internet. Definitely not any for Rescue Rangers, The Legend of Korra, or The Brave Little Toaster. If you believe the previous statements, please slap yourself in the face and then refer to this. Never venture onto the internet unprepared, my boy! 

Ah yes, that leads us to Bronies. Do I consider myself one of them? Not really, no. I don't have anything against them, but I think they're a bit... intense. No more intense than fans who are so into Star Trek that they dress up and go to Star Trek conventions, but I don't understand those people either. I've never been a fan of something so much that I do something like that. BUT, I say let them have their fun because, newsflash, you can like something without being a superfan. I like the ponies. I like them like I like Adventure Time or Young Justice. Unfortunately, what we've got in this case is an amazing animated series that has the "My Little Pony" label slapped on it with all the stigma that comes with it. I say, get over it. It's not what you think it is. It's not a show for everybody, but it is a show for most of us. Do you like cartoons? There is a 99% chance you will like this show if you give it a try. That's just proven science. Here's 10 reasons why friendship is magic:

1. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic was created by Lauren Faust, wife of motherfucking Craig McCraken
Who in the blarney stone is Craig McCraken? Well, other than having the most badass name in the universe, he's the guy who created Powerpuff Girls and Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. Guess who worked with him on those shows? Lauren. Faust.

2. The show was created specifically to not suck
Lauren Faust was a big fan of My Litte Pony as a girl. Except it sucked. She wanted to make a version that wasn't for brain dead chimps and actually had things like writing character development.

3. The people who make it are an all-star team in the industry
Lauren Faust made a story bible outlining the universe of the show and brought on an all-star cast of writers whose credits include: Sym-Bionic Titan, Gravity Falls, Dexter's Lab, Johnny Bravo, Samurai Jack, Powerpuff Girls, Billy & Mandy, Adventure Time, Fairly Oddparents, Danny Phantom, Chowder, Foster's Home, Ben 10, Kim Possible, Spongebob, Wild Thornberrys, Angry Beavers, Aaahh!!! Real Monsters, and Rugrats. The in charge of all these writers was none other than Rob Renzetti

4. It's basically Doug with technicolor ponies
Remember Doug? Chances are, you do. And chances are you loved Doug. Friendship is Magic is pretty much Doug with ponies. Each episode, they learn a life lesson and write a letter about it. For the most part, the show is a slice-of-life comedy except when...

If it reminds you of Powerpuff Girls... well, there's a reason for that.
5. They vanquish goddamn evil beasts with the power of friendship
In the first episode, the "girliest" character kicks a manticore in the face. Let me repeat that: The most feminine character kicks a manticore in the face in the first episode. Why? They're trying to defeat and evil unicorn from blotting out the sun forever. So, basically Dawnguard. Later, they battle an army of shapeshifting clones, freeze the lord of chaos in stone, and destroy evil incarnate with pure love. Each pony wields an Element of Harmony that can obliterate pretty much anything when combined. Think of it like Captain Planet without being a dumb PSA. Fun fact: The company that made Captain Planet, Dic, is now owned by the company that makes My Little Pony, DHX.

6. It's got a cast that anyone can relate to
The "Mane 6" ponies are a diverse bunch and you're bound to find somebody like yourself. That's what makes the show so damn relatable. The cast includes:

  • Twilight Sparkle: An antisocial bookworm unicorn who was a child prodigy in the magic arts. So good in fact, that she was made apprentice to the woman who is essentially the tyrannical overlord of the world, Princess Celestia, and given a fucking baby dragon as her personal assistant. One day, Celestia kicks her ass out of the castle and tells her to go make some friends for once in her life. Represents the element of magic.
  • Applejack: An orphan earth pony who runs the local apple farm and raises her little sister while trying to deal with her senile grandmother older brother who only speaks in one-word sentences. Represents the element of honesty.
  • Fluttershy: A pegasus with crippling shyness who prefers to stay grounded by living in a cottage in the woods with a bunch of wild animals. She represents the element of kindness and is the best pony.
  • Rarity: The selfish unicorn who somehow represents the element of generosity (yeah right). She is a fashion designer and somewhat abusive older sister.
  • Rainbow Dash: A tomboy pegasus with dreams of someday being a professional arial acrobat. She represents loyalty and is at least 20% cooler than the other ponies.
  • Pinkie Pie: PInkie is the Deadpool of the group. She's constantly cracking jokes, defying gravity, and breaking the fourth wall. She represents laughter, for obvious reasons. May or may not be a compulsive partier.
  • Spike: Spike is a melodramatic dragon who doesn't represent any element because nobody gives a crap about him.
Kitty go splat.
7. The people who make it are way into the fandom
Have you ever heard of Derpy Hooves? You've probably seen a picture of her at some point. Grey pony with derp eyes? Yeah, she was a very popular animation error. So popular that the show's creators not only adopted the fan-given name of Derpy, but began writing her into the show as a minor character. Now that's fanservice! There's plenty of adult references in the show, too, like a group of bowling ponies representing characters from The Big Lebowski. And while the show may have been created with the intention of targeting girls, the new comic book series certainly isn't at all. Stuff that the fans make up either become cannon or are alluded to in the show. How's that for fanservice? 

8. The fans are talented as hell
My Little Pony is animated in Flash, wich means the fans can make some ridiculously high-quality parody stuff. Right now, there's a freaking 24-minute fan made episode in the works that looks just like the real thing. There's an abridged series. There's music and comics and crafts and even unofficial fighting games. Don't like ponies? Maybe you'd like to have them beat each other up. You can, because the fans make it happen. But this is a topic for another post.

9. Daniel Ingram is a musical genius
The show has a lot of original musical numbers, and he's the guy behind them. Typically I don't even like musicals. They don't even make any sense. People don't just break into song and suddenly everyone everywhere knows all the words. But this music? This is, uh, magical. There's one song in particular that always lifts my spirits. It's got enough joy to make Plankton writhe in pain. It is, of course, brought to you by Pinkie Pie.



10. Don't you wish you could be a part of all the in-jokes?
Check out Friendship is magic right now! You'll be glad you did. Though I suggest you don't start at the beginning because it can be a turnoff. I watched the first episode and it didn't grab me. It was months before I gave it another shot. Some people never do. Those poor folks. So here's a list of my personal favorites that are almost guaranteed to make you fall in love.

  • Sonic Rainboom (season 1, episode 16): Rinbow Dash enters the young fliers competition in hopes of pulling off the ultimate trick. Except the element of generosity herself, Rarity, steals the spotlight... and pays the price.
  • Party of One (season 1, episode 25): Otherwise known as "Pinkie Pie's descent into madness."
  • Lesson Zero (season 2, episode 3): Otherwise known as "Twilight Sparkle's descent into madness."
  • The Last Roundup (season 2, episode 14): Applejack goes out of town to compete in a rodeo and doesn't return. Her friends set out to look for her but don't like what they find.
  • Putting Your Hoof Down (season 2, episode 19): Fluttershy attends a seminar on how to be more assertive by a minotaur named Iron Will. She thinks that it's working, but it's really just making her a bitch.
  • It's About Time (season 2, episode 20): Twilight goes insane again, this time after receiving a mysterious warning from her future self.
  • Ponyville Confidential (season 2, episode 23): The Cutiemark Crusaders are a group consisting of Applejack's sister, Rarity's sister, and some random, seemingly orphaned pegasus. The three are constantly on a quest to find their life's true calling. In this installment, they end up turning the school newspaper into a tabloid and hurting almost everyone in town.
  • If you prefer action, adventure, and epic villains, try the season two or three premier, or the finale of season two.

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